Saw 34 - Short Review

I will start this review by making it clear that I despise the Saw franchise. While I enjoyed the first couple of films upon their release the franchise quickly spiraled from a relatively simple premise into a ridiculous convoluted mess that came pretty close to unintentional self parody. It was always difficult for me to understand how this franchise continued to survive and be profitable despite all of its flaws. Therefore, I am always happy to spend some time with a project that attempts to skewer this franchise for what it is.

"Saw 34" is a short 6 minute video that is currently available on Funny or Die. The creator of the video contacted us and asked if we would be willing to check it out. Apparently made for a meager 60 bucks and a pizza this is played as the 34th entry in the Saw franchise which I am honestly surprised isn't a real thing yet. Of course the key to whether or not this will work as a parody is how successfully the creators can skewer everything that's ridiculous about the Saw films.

Without giving too much away I think that overall they succeeded in creating a product that fans and haters of the Saw films will enjoy. All of the key points are addressed such as the fact that Jigsaw always seems to have someone willing to put on a pig mask and assist with abducting people off of the street. In Saw 34 it's a guy named Keith who is still in training. The ridiculous monologues that Jigsaw always has to deliver to his victims are in here as well only he's become so bored with coming up with crap to say that he resorts to reading the ingredients off of a Cheerios box. All he needs to do is read the words in that gutteral Jigsaw voice and they come off as both threatening and intellectual. The fact that it would be almost impossible for every scenario to play out exactly as planned is also addressed. What are the odds that all of the victims would so simply be abducted and that all of them would play directly into the traps the way Jigsaw plans. Everything is so dependent on the reactions of the abducted that it's almost impossible to accurately predict what they will do or say. Lastly the have to address the traps themselves. Everyone that's seen a saw film knows how intricate and over the top the traps and scenarios became as the films moved along. By the time Saw 34 comes around Jigsaw has exhausted his ideas and capabilities to the point that the victim simply needs to make a choice between an apple and a banana. Sam hates bananas but the apple is spongy, the choice is his.

Overall I enjoyed Saw 34. I am not usually a big fan of parody because feature length parodies tend to overstay their welcome and the jokes just become a barrage of pop culture references. However, in small doses like this where the focus is on one single film the format can shine. They are able to poke fun at all of the things that make Saw so ridiculous without ever going overboard. It's just the right amount to make anyone who has seen even one of these films have a good laugh. I would definitely recommend you go and check this one out!

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/0727307ec5/saw-34

Podcast Episode 30

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Episode 30 is a packed one at just over 2 hours with Adam, Mike and Jeff all returning to the MTF studio following our brief hiatus. For the main part of our show we first return to the low budget world of Fred Olen Ray with 2004's Tomb of the Werewolf. We then take a trip back to the 80's with the 2013 found footage flick, "WNUF Halloween Special". Also, Adam argues that Jaws is the greatest film ever made, Mike tries to convey just how bad the new Ninja Turtles movie is and much much more! Enjoy!

Phoenix Fearcon

Hey everyone, we wanted to take a minute to let everyone know about a cool event coming to the Phoenix Arizona area in November of 2014. On November 1st and 2nd Fearcon descends on the city of Phoenix. Fearcon is Arizona's largest independent horror event and looks like it will be a blast for anyone able to attend. In addition to a lineup of guests including Ken Foree, Debbie Rochon, Tiffany Shepis and more they will also be screening a bunch of independently produced features and short films. So head on over to their website www.phoenixfearcon.com for all of the details and how to stay updated and if you are in the Phoenix area on the 1st and 2nd of November be sure to check out Phoenix Fearcon!

Stage Fright (2014) Review

I love slasher movies. Musicals, not so much. It's not that I hate all musicals. In fact, there are a handful of horror musicals that I really enjoy. Little Shop of Horrors, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Cannibal the Musical and more recently Repo the Genetic Opera all managed to successfully merge horror or science fiction with full fledged musical numbers. So, while I was hesitant approaching Stage Fright I've seen horror musicals work so I kept my mind open.

The film opens as most slasher movies do with a murder and it's surprisingly graphic. A knife is put into the back of a character's head and is then violently stabbed multiple times. It sets off a tone that I wasn't expecting from a horror musical which is dark and graphically violent. The tone changes pretty quickly though as we flash forward several years to a musical theater camp and our first musical number featuring all of the kids in the camp. We also see that Meat Loaf is the camp leader who is given plenty of time to show off his own vocal talents. It's bright, cheery and funny and is in stark contrast to the opening scene. Throughout the movie there are major tone shifts like this and it is actually kind of an issue. The slasher element is brutal with kills that are ultraviolent in nature. This is juxtaposed with a summer camp comedy film that borders on parody. There's no point where the two really seem to mesh well together so it feels like two different movies trying to come together. It's a similar issue that I find with "The Burning". That films feels like an 80's summer camp comedy with a slasher film thrown in to bookend it. This feels like a summer camp parody with a slasher movie shoehorned in. There needs to be some compromise in style on both ends so that the film feels cohesive.

The killer is a kabuki masked psychopath who screams like the lead singer in a metal band whenever killing someone. The costume works and the killer certainly comes off as menacing given how violently they take out their targets. The practical effects are also very good. One scene in particular features a victim having a lightbulb with the lamp still attached shoved into his mouth and is then viciously thrown away like a ragdoll. It's effectively gruesome as are most of the on-screen kills throughout the movie and is in line with some of the nastier giallo or 80's slasher films.

In the final act the movie does come together better as the students perform their end of camp production while the killer runs around behind the scenes picking many of them off. As usual the killer and their motives are revealed (thought it's not too difficult to figure out who it is) and it all plays out in typical slasher movie fashion. While I wasn't blown away by Stage Fright I can recommend checking it out. It's not something I see myself revisiting any time soon but for a one time watch it's got some great kills, solid performances, catchy musical numbers, and some genuinely funny comedic moments involving all kinds of genre tropes. It's on Netflix for the moment so check it out!

Score: 3/5

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Podcast Episode 29

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Episode 29 features some lengthy discussions on a variety of topics including how to kill Wolverine, Rob Zombies newest venture, TMNT and more! We also review Class of 1999 2: The Substitute and Grim Prairie Tales. Enjoy!

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Scumbag Hustler (2014) Review

Podcast Episode 28

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In Episode 28 we are talking westerns and cyborgs. First Adam continues his "Class of" retrospective with the second in the series, "Class of 1999". Then Mike reviews the 1964 spaghetti western Sergio Leone classic, "A Fistful of Dollars". We also talk about what we've been watching and recent news items including "Mad Max Fury Road" and "Walking Dead Season 5". Enjoy!

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Joy Ride 3: Roadkill - Review

Joy Ride 3 sees Rusty Nail return with his trusty tractor trailer to run down a new set of victims. This time his sights are set on a group of young street racers on their way to Canada to take part in a competition known as the Road Rally 1000.

The original Joy Ride is a movie that surprised the hell out of me when I first saw it. Filled with suspense, likable characters, good acting, a simple premise and a frightening antagonist it was easy to be sucked into the story and come out at the end satisfied. That’s why it’s so disappointing to see this become nothing more than a modern slasher franchise that utilizes characters we can only barely like, features kills that feel like rejects from a Saw movie and seems to be positioning Rusty as a wise-cracking slasher in the vein of Freddy Krueger rather than an ominous presence hidden behind the wheel of his truck.

The film opens with two meth heads in a motel room, high as kites and having sex. They run out of meth so they come up with the bright idea of calling a trucker on the CB radio and robbing him of cash and drugs. Of course they call up Rusty Nail who proceeds to tie them to the front of his truck and tell them that if they can hold on for one mile he will let them go. You can see why I make the Saw reference as most of the kills are setup in a way to torture the victim and draw out their death. So right from the opening scene we have two characters being killed by Rusty who fully deserve what they get. Seeing them be run over by his big rig is satisfying rather than terrifying. I will say that Ken Kirzinger chews up his role as Rusty Nail and is a good fit for the role but setting up the audience to root for him is a mis-step.

After this opening we are introduced to our main cast of characters. They include two incredibly annoying women and a bunch of completely underdeveloped male characters. We are simply supposed to define them by the fact that they race cars. The only character I found myself even remotely liking was Austin and that was because he makes a Large Marge reference which I can totally appreciate. It’s the only scene in the movie where I found myself smiling.

As you can imagine the remaining run-time is filled with the racers running afoul of Rusty and he kills them off in various creative ways while they continually make horrible baffling decisions. He ties onecharacter to the top of his truck and drives full speed under a bridge. He places one characters head between a lift and the bottom of his truck slowly crushing it. He sets up an elaborate contraption where one characters head is slowly wrapped with a chain and impaled. There are a few others as well but most involve some sort of elaborate setup. Again, this is why I make the Saw comparison. He puts in so much work to kill these people when all he has to do is run them over with his truck.

I don’t have much more to say about the movie. It’s from the director of Wrong Turn 3, 4 & 5 which I have yet to see but haven't heard many good things. Hopefully the Joy Ride franchise calls it quits at 3 and we aren’t exposed to any additional sequels though I doubt it. Overall it’s a formulaic run of the mill slasher movie with unlikable bland characters and an unoriginal uninspired story that left me bored. There are some good gore effects, decent car chases, and the acting’s not half-bad but that’s hardly enough to save this movie.

Score: 1.5/5

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